November 12, 2007
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The Continued Adventures of School Career Day
"Alright class, let's give Arthur's mother a round of
applause for speaking today... Thank you, Mrs. Anderson. Next, we have Henry's
father. Could you please stand up?""I'm still mad at mom for letting you come."
"Thank you for the applause, children of the future. As
your teacher mentioned, I am Henry's father. Now, let me ask you. How many of
you want to grow up and be famous?... Alright, I see a good number of hands up.
Well, I'm something of a famous figure myself. If you ever went shopping with
your folks, you may have seen my picture. You see, I am a very popular
underwear model.""Dad... please don't..."
"It all started when I was nothing more than a tyke. My
parents, Henry's grandparents, had me take part in several diaper commercials.
Your folks may know the old tune. J-Mart diapers, that's name! Change
them fast: no mess, no pain!"(vacant stares)
"Well, it's been off the air for years now. I had a
series of odd jobs after high school, but I finally hit big when I was
recruited by Fruit of the Loom at a local Speed-O convention. Ah, that was the
beginning of my golden age. After my first shots got around, more and more
companies wanted me modeling. Fruit of the Loom, Hanes, Ralph Lauren, Calvin
Klein, Heinz; you name it, I posed for it. I was making so much money. Ugh, but
then there was all the drugs and whores. I must've had the clap on three
different occasions.""Uh... Mr. Henderson... you can't-"
"Please, let me finish teach.
Sheesh, I'm getting all teary-eyed. Let me tell you, being a famous underwear
model is a dead-end profession. I could've been something! But did anyone care
about the name of some underwear wearer? No! All they tell you is shut up,
strip down, and pose. *sniff* It's horrible. All of those... eyes! I did so
many drugs. It helped me cope. Then, all of a sudden, I wasn't getting any new
jobs. *hiccough* The bastards kicked me out! Now, just like before, I'm stuck
doing odd jobs again. Nobody knows me. It's like I never existed. Oh God, what
have I been doing with my life!? *sob*""I always wondered the same
thing, dad.""All pointless! I can't kick
the drugs. My wife and kid hates me. Oh God, oh God, I should've been
something! Where's my diamond-studded Hummer, huh!? Oh God...""Wait, Mr. Henderson, step
away from the window. What are you-""All worthless! F@*& it
all!""Dad!... He jumped."
"No real need to worry, Henry. We're only on the
ground floor. Your father should, hopefully, be alright. Look he's getting up
now, poor man."
Comments (4)
It's always those kid's parents that are the coolest, don't you think?
I wish something exciting like that used to happen at our school...
By the way which version of Harvest Moon DS do you have? I thought that there was only one version of Harvest Moon avaiable on NDS?
Anyway, in my one you can only have Muffy, Nami, Flora, Lumina and Celia. Mine was Celia. And then you could have four special brides which I haven't tried yet because you have to make friends with their friends in town first. But basically you could marry the Harvest Goddess, Witch Princess, Leia or Keria. The old crew of brides were only there on festivals as the host so you could never marry them...at least I thought...I haven't played on it that much, though I'm sure I didn't see nay hearts when I spoke to them. It's quite new and then I left it at home when I went to uni...So stupid...
I checked on good old wiki and I found out what you mean - damn! I never had a game boy so I never got any of those games...I can't believe that you can marry the males! That's too hilarious. So does Harvest moon remain a man?
I miss Harvest Moon so much...Wouldn't it be great if Harvest Moon and all the characters were real and you had a real Town like that.
By the way do you have the PS2 version of "It's a wonderful life"? I didn't like it much and haven't played on it much at all. The graphics, I thought, were terrible and if you ever worked at night or early morning the screen freezes or you can't see a thing and you have to be rescued my sunrise...It's so lame. The worst thing was that the digging was completely different to all other Harvest Moon games that I've played on, it's really weird how there's only one level and you have to dig the same patch over and over again and the finds were really rubbish as well. But if you think it's good I might play it in the holidays when I go back home.
So tyra bank in a few years?
The whole lot you agree is true, I ruminate therefore
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