January 10, 2011

• The Ultimate 80s Embodiment

  Okay readers, I believe I have reached a conclusion. After much soul searching and digging through my somewhat extensive pop culture knowledge, I have finally decided on the song that most represents the 80s music era. It took some significant effort to try and define just how such a thing would be chosen. Here were my basic criteria:

  • It had to have a repetitive but catchy synth line
  • It had to have a trippy music video
  • It had to be a one-hit wonder
  • It had to be a song that everybody would recognize by sound, but could not name without a reminder
  • The video has to have a creepy-looking lead singer
  • It had to just feel 80s-ish

  That last point is exceptionally ambiguous, but important. I could not possibly refine it any further, but I'm sure most of you are smart enough to understand.

  I have decided that Baltimora's "Tarzan Boy" meets and exceeds all of the criteria and is most representative of the 80s decade in music. The music video pretty much says everything that needs to be said.

  This was a difficult decision, especially near the end when I tried to narrow it down from other top contenders, like Dead or Alive's "You Spin Me Round" and Billy Ocean's "Get Outta My Dreams, Get into My Car". Ultimately, however, they were ruled out for being able to name the title without a hint and for not being a one-hit wonder, respectively.

  Now to deal with this decision's hate-mail…

  • 5:46 pm
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