Month: April 2005

  • Dude, I think I found one of the coolest product names out there. Check out this vitamin supplement:

    You know... It's kind of like this guy...

    A
    funny product name offers one of the best segways into funny company
    names. Check out some of these companies that gave me a laugh.

    S&M Paving
    I couldn't find a good picture

    Ah... good stuff. Peace out for now!

  • And now a Public Service Announcement from the Jimbo Advisory Board

       Little Jimmy was skipping merrily to his car one morning
    in order to arrive to another fresh day of school. He opened his door,
    put away his backpack, got in his seat, and shut the door. He noticed
    immediately something was wrong. He opened the door to see what the
    problem was and heard a smash.
       What happened? To find out, we must look back into Jimmy's past...
       Not long ago, Jimmy's side mirror was in bad shape. It was
    about ready to fall off because the glue that held it on was about 12
    years old. Before it fell off, he removed it carefully and re-affixed
    it with duct tape. This worked just fine and dandy. He had to
    periodically replace the duct tape due to normal road wear-and-tear,
    but Jimmy was fine with it.
       Soon, however, Jimmy's father found out about this whole
    mess and decided a more permanent cure was in order. He decided that
    Super Glue would have a more permanent hold on the mirror. It was glued
    and all seemed to be going well. That is, until that fateful day
    approximately two weeks later.
       Jimmy looked down on the asphalt and saw his fallen mirror
    in pieces. He now had to drive to school and back with no side mirror.
       The moral: Do not try to fix your car with Super Glue. Use the vastly superior duct tape instead.

    This has been a Public Service Announcement from the Jimbo Advisory Board.

  • Like, oh my God. I, like, totally went to school today! And, like, then that was totally over. And then I totally went home!

    Enough of that. Anyway, today I would like to do absolutely nothing but say...

    Currently Eating
    Rice-A-Roni - Fried Rice
    see related

  • This is something I was thinking about on the car ride home from S.C. a
    while ago. I was wondering how they got the voice actors for the
    pokemon in the TV show / movie(s). I mean, the script probably goes
    something like this...

    Pikachu: pika pika
    Squirtle: squirtle squirtle
    Pikachu: (angrily) chu...

    WTF?! How is someone supposed to work with that? I would laugh my head
    off if someone offered me to do the part of Cubone or something. Of
    course, after I was through I would accept because those voice actors
    probably see more money in a week than I have even seen in my life.

    Anyway, let me give you a little food for thought. Picture Pikachu and
    what it sounds like. Now picture it speaking with the following voice
    actors:

    - Arnold Schwarzenegger
    - Leslie Neilson
    - Sylvester Stallone
    - Barry White
    - Gilbert Godfrey
    - Andy Dick
    - Any other funny voices you can think of

    Hope you enjoyed the day. By the way, I got a 4.09 gpa right now. So BOO-YA!!!!1!!

  • And now a Public Service Announcement from the Jimbo Advisory Board

       Little Jimmy was on his way home with his family after a
    long road trip. His father was at the wheel with his new fiance, Ms.
    Legal Guardian, and her two children, Sister-in-Law v1.0 and
    Brother-in-Law v1.0. Jimmy did not particularly enjoy the trip, but put
    up with it nonetheless. The group was nearly home when all of a
    sudden, the engine died! Mr. Dad pulled over and proceeded to give the
    engine the obligatory look-over. He did not know what the problem was,
    so Ms. Legal Guardian called AAA.
       AAA heard the complaint and told them that it would cost
    $3 per mile to tow the vehicle and even more money for a taxi to taxi
    all of the people with the truck. Mrs. Legal Guardian was
    flabbergasted.
       Instead of agreeing to the illogical course of action, she
    did the right thing and hung up on the greedy bastards. The five of
    them waited in the car in hopes that the engine will miraculously
    repair itself. Shortly after, a friendly tow-truck driver spotted us
    and pulled over. We explained the problem to him and he decided to tow
    the vehicle for much less than what AAA was preaching. Also, he would
    illegally allow the occupants to sit in the vehicle being towed. Now
    that is helpful!
       Jimmy and his (shudder) family rode home and were greatful to the anonymous tow-truck driver.
      The moral: Don't call AAA for roadside assistance. Wait for a good samaratan instead!

    This has been a Public Service Announcement from the Jimbo Advisory Board.

  • Look down.

    Best. CD. Ever.

    If you don't agree, just look at the song list.

    Disc 1
    1. "Mississippi Queen" - Mountain
    2. "Smoke on the Water" - Deep Purple
    3. "Hot Blooded" - Foreigner
    4. "Slow Ride" - Foghat
    5. "The Stroke" - Billy Squier
    6. "Free-for-All" - Ted Nugent
    7. "Smokin' in the Boys' Room" - Brownsville Station
    8. "Rock and Roll, Hoochie Koo" - Rick Derringer
    9. "Surrender" - Cheap Trick
    10. "Working for the Weekend" - Loverboy
    11. "Any Way You Want It" - Journey
    12. "Two Tickets To Paradise" - Eddie Money
    13. "Hold the Line" - Toto
    14. "Roll With the Changes" - REO Speedwagon
    15. "No One to Run With" - The Allman Brothers Band
    16. "Voodoo Chld (Slight Return)" - Stevie Ray Vaughan and Double Trouble
    17. "Bad To The Bone" - George Thorogood & The Destroyers
    18. "Simple Man" - Lynyrd Skynyrd

    Disc 2
    1. "Smokin'" - Boston
    2. "Flirtin' With Disaster" - Molly Hatchet
    3. "Living After Midnight" - Judas Priest
    4. "I Wanna Rock" - Twisted Sister
    5. "Metal Health (Bang Your Head)" - Quiet Riot
    6. "Godzilla" - Blue Oyster Cult
    7. "Frankenstein" - The Edgar Winter Group
    8. "Carry on Wayward Son" - Kansas
    9. "We're an American Band" - Grand Funk Railroad
    10. "Don't Bring Me Down" - E.L.O.
    11. "Takin' Care of Business" - Bachman-Turner Overdrive
    12. "Long Cool Woman (In A Black Dress)" - The Hollies
    13. "Rockin' Down the Highway" - The Doobie Brothers
    14. "Black Betty" - Ram Jam
    15. "School's Out" - Alice Cooper
    16. "Bat Out Of Hell" - Meatloaf
    17. "Hold Your Head Up" - Argent

    Buy this CD... now!

  • It is done. In a joint effort between me and Don Roberto,
    we are counting the number of swears used in three of the best selling
    Grand Theft Auto games. I am speaking of course of III, Vice City, and
    San Andreas. For my part, I was to count the number of lewd words used
    in San Andreas. Now this was no easy task. I think it is safe to say
    that almost every mission had at least one swear. Some of these words
    you may not find as swears. I, for one, do not accept h---, ba-----, and
    n----, as swear words. But some do, so they're included.

    Okay, to begin. To protect the poor virgin ears (er... eyes) of any
    young viewers, I will censor the words out and place clues so
    mature readers can understand the word I am getting at. Here you are.


    In the number 8 spot, we have ba-----. The clue is ~ "a child born out of wedlock"
    15

    In number 7, we have h---. Clue is, "Satan calls this place home."
    39

    In number 6, we have n----. The clue is, "what once was the white-man's word is now the black-man's word"
    41

    Number 5: b---- "a female dog"
    48

    Number 4: d--- "To be banished to word No. 7"
    57

    Number 3: a-- "You can kiss my ___"
    89

    Here comes the big numbers.
    Number 2: s--- "You are full of ____"
    302

    And Number 1
    f---
    "____ the police"
    339

    Wow,
    I swear that that's a lot of swearing. Surly Mr. Roberto will post his
    findings in due time, along with some nice-looking ratios. So until
    next time, peace out n----s!

  • I've got nothing today. Um... Currently playing... The Legend of Zelda: The Minish Cap. Good game. Pity I beat it in ~10 hours.

    Also, go here and check out the movie trailer. Marvin's xanga

  • And now a Public Service Announcement from the Jimbo Advisory Board...

       Little Jimmy has now completed another school day. He is
    skips merrily to his car and enters. He turns the key only to realize
    (gasp) his car won't start. Flabbergasted, Jimmy looks for what he
    suspects is the problem. Sure enough, he left his headlights on all
    day. Jimmy is shocked and embarassed.
       Just then, Jimmy sees his school chums Mr. Chin and Mr.
    Grazinski. Looking friendly to cover his embarassment, Jimmy walks over
    to the pair as they enter Mr. Chin's car.
       "Good afternoon, my friend," Jimmy said happily. "'Tis fine weather we have today."
       "Indeed sir," replied Mr. Chin. "However, 'tis a bit blustery, I daresay."
       "Quite so," Jimmy said, nodding. "If you'll excuse me, I
    have a favor to ask. Do you see the car behind the blue truck just
    yonder down the lot?"
       "Yes I do sir."
       "Good. That is the car the belongs to me. I would like to humbly request that you assist by giving me a jump."
       "Certainly, my good friend. Let me just pull my car up next to yours and we shall do remedy this small trifle."
        "I am truly grateful."
        Jimmy walks over to his car with Mr. Grazinski while
    Mr. Chin drives his car closer to Jimmy's vehicle. Both open their
    car's hood and peer inside.
        "It seems that my car has a slightly cleaner engine, friend," Jimmy said.
        "It seems so," Mr. Chin agreed. Jimmy pulled out his
    handy-dandy jumper cables from the back of his car, and the two hooked
    their engines to one another. "Now what?"
        "I am afraid that I am unsure," Jimmy said.
        "Why don't I ask my good friend, Mr. Labinis," Mr.
    Chin said, and called over the individual who was walking by. Mr.
    Labinis explained what was required to do from there and Jimmy's car
    was eventually started. He thanked Mr. Chin and the others and went on
    his way. He was embarassed.
        Unfortunately, Jimmy was noticed by scores of his
    schoolmates. Jimmy was eventually shunned by all of his classmates and
    lived an exiled life for the rest of his days.
        Don't let this happen to you! Remember to turn off your headlights after exiting your car!

    This has been a Public Service Announcement from the Jimbo Advisory Board.