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For those of you who don't already know, I work at a
mattress store. A store called Mattress Warehouse, to be specific. I was
looking through our stock and laughing at some of the mattress names.
Seriously, some of them are pretty funny. Especially if you attach a sexual
innuendo to them. Sealy has a bunch out that, I suppose, are marketed to
newlyweds who are still in heavy shag-mode. They have names like
"Compelling" and "Adulation". Our rival store, Mattress
Discounters, has even more risque titles. Their Simmons line has names like
"Pure Temptation," "Pure Elation," "Pure
Encouraging," and "Pure Escape." Kind of makes you want to
adjust your shirt collar a little. Serta has some, at my store, that have funny
ones sans the sexual conotations. There's the "Moonlight Waters,"
which I think makes you want to pee. To be honest, that one didn't last long.
It was out for maybe a month 'til they scrapped it. Somebody in marketing must
have actually looked at the name and thought, "wait a minute..."
Serta's "Warm Breeze" is funny too. I just brings up feelings of
digestive peristalsis. I'm sure the partner truly appreciates that "warm
breeze." Anyway, that's enough of that. Until next time, peace out.

Okay, I should be back now. I had lots of stuff to get adjusted to, with a large slab of down internet to top it off. So I'm back now, and today's topic is going to be about Morgan Spurlock. You know, he's the guy who did the movie-documentary Supersize Me. Yeah, that guy. Woah, wait, don't go away. I'm not going to get all in your face about eating right and stuff. Good heavens, no! I'm just saying I read his book and wanted to make some comments about it. Anyway, I was at work, eating a Big Mac, reading Spurlock's book, and thinking, "wow, this burger is mighty tasty." That is beside the point, however. My point is that Spurlock makes some good points. Fast food is bad for you. Sure. We, as humans, should exercise more. Okay. The government should be more active. Yup. These are all great, but I still don't feel like changing. I finished his book and said, "I feel like getting a pecan roll." After eating one, I thought, "nope, I don't think anything about me is going to change." I'm sure that's how a lot of people are. They know everything is bad for you (except for people who like to sue anything that doesn't have a warning label), but they're not going to change. On another note, I wonder where one can get little packets of high fructose corn syrup. This book makes it sound like the best stuff on the planet. If (almost) everyone uses it as a sweetener, it has to taste great. Well, that's all I have to say about that. I'm going to order me a pizza. Peace.

Okay, I'm almost at one-hundred percent. It's been a busy Labor Day weekend. Please have no fear, and keep checking this space for updates when they happen.

Oh, and let me also express my regrets towards the death of Steve Irwin. May his death teach a valuable lesson about the hazards of swimming with sting rays.

Sorry for not updating in a while. For the lack of a better cliche, I've had a lot on my plate. Let me just get everything straightened out, and I'll be back as soon as possible.