If a left turn is essentially a right turn done wrong,that would mean three wrongs, not two, are necessary to make a right.
I have found that new-car transport truck drivers andmini cooper drivers are generally the quickest and best to be behind.
We need another four-star general.
Ocean Spray has a line of raisins, which are actuallycranberries, that has been given an orange flavor. Does that sound funny toanyone else?
Who else thinks those shoes with the little wheels inback that you can roll around on look incredibly silly?
The phrase “terminal leave” always makes me thinksomeone is dying.
Who else has preordered their copy of The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiyalimited edition DVD? I know I have.
Don’t you hate it when a tiny chunk of popcorn getscaught in your throat?
A purr-anha: a cat and piranha crossbreed.
I wonder how many people who’s mothers made them eatsoap when they swore developed some sort of disorder from it.
I think it’s time for a lawn vacuum to be invented.
There needs to be a constitutional amendment thatdictates which way a toilet paper roll should face.
In reference to fortune cookies: I wonder what theratio of good fortunes to bad fortunes is.
100% pure bottled water! (may include trace elements oflead, arsenic, asbestos, urine, blood, peanuts, and salt)
I like learning about religion, but I don’t likereligion. I like learning about it to justify my distaste for it.
If a movie is released on January 1st, is itallowed to call itself “the best movie released so far this year”?
When you stop at a red light, and all of the cars youpassed a long time ago catch up to you, don’t you feel like a prick for a fewseconds?
I recently saw a bumper ribbon that read “pray for ourtroops.” I realized that terrorists pray for their troops too. The differenceis that they actually mean it.
I wonder how many fat people who are pictured from theneck down are actually paid for their photo.
If your surname is Jablomy, it is not recommended thatyou name your child Haywood.
What is it in asparagus that makes your urine smellfunny?
Taking a bullet for somebody only works if it’s thefirst and only bullet.
I’m about ready for a cell phone with a compass.
Anyone who suggests using only one square of toiletpaper at a time clearly has no sense of reality.
Wouldn’t it be creepy if humans grew from spores?
I am amazed at the sheer number of people who do notknow how to operate a pen.
The famous video game known as Spore will be delayed until mid-2008, sources say. My thoughts on this include "dammit!"
I recently saw a Lifesavers wrapper that bragged thatit had 33% less calories. I checked, and this claim is indeed true. Each tartwas reduced from three to two calories.
Usually I’m not into modern music, but I have had thissong stuck in my head for far too long.
Comments (2)
Lol there's never any traffic in the middle-of-nowhere part I go to. It's called Bayse or something like that.
Where can I preorder MoHS!??! I really really want to get it, but I don't know of anyplace that would allow me to preorder it.