Just the other day, I was eating an orange, and
the convenient little sticker on the outside told me, in no uncertain terms,
that that orange was grown in Africa. My first thought upon reading this was,
"my gods, could this be a 'conflict orange?'" You all have heard of
blood diamonds, or conflict diamonds, that are used as a universal currency for
the sale of every form of contraband from firearms to bootleg anime. With that
said, not all African people have access to vast diamond mines. How are these
people supposed to arm themselves? They use other forms of currency, such as
dirt, prostitutes, peace activists, and oranges in this case. Whatever company
imported these oranges (the sticker conveniently did not say) must have traded
for a few AKs, of which they have abundance. Who knows what evil and despicable
organization could have gone through with this trade? The Russian Mafia? The Yakuza?
Lockheed-Martin? Del Monte? I doubt we will ever find out, but I am sure US
customs officials are cracking down on these illegal oranges, and the blood
that is spilt for their tastiness.
Comments (2)
I smell the evil workings of teletubbies. Behind those creepy smiles lies evil genius beyond the comprehension of many. Only the evil cunning of the teletubbies could have thought up trading a common fruit for deadly weapons.
"Would you like a Mikan?
Have one Delivered!
just log onto Mikan-overnight.com
And we'll send you a cuuute Mikan overnight.
Mikan-overnight.dom, delivering little bundles of love, in a box, directly to your door."
Oh yeah, don't forget about chocolate. Lots of chocolate is grown is Africa, conflict-chocolate, so don't forget to take a pocket full of Hersheys bars when you go and hire a bunch of mercs there. Better stuff some m&ms in there too, they melt in your mouth, not in the hands of your hired army!