August 1, 2007

• Some Thoughts 14

  • I'm
    tired of only seeing hot dogs at eating competitions. I want to see
    something like fettuccini Alfredo in a contest and see how many speed
    eaters keel over.
  • If you
    sneeze, and no one is around to say "God bless you," does a god
    bless you anyway?
  • There
    is no tactful way to word "pit stains."
  • There's
    no act more rebellious than drinking milk that's past its expiration date.
  • You
    would think that rapists would start wearing goggles while "on duty"
    to protect from pepper spray.
  • Cops
    don't like it when you point out of the window at a flock of crows and
    say, "hey look, a murder!"
  • Biscuit
    Lincoln
    would be a great name for a band.
  • I
    wonder how many times a day Google gets pinged.
  • You
    can tell the AC in my car is broken by the way that my left arm is
    significantly more tanned than my right.
  • I hope
    no one sees me as the kind of guy that sits in a cafe and writes. That's
    just silly.
  • I see
    nothing wrong with mediocrity.
  • Ever
    have one of those days when you accidentally wash your body with shampoo
    and your hair with soap?
  • It
    would be stupid, but I am sure that there are people out there with
    leather bath towels.
  • Once
    some new microorganism appears that degrades plastic, we are going to be
    screwed.
  • It is
    an odd feeling when you find a birthday card from several years ago that
    still has money in it.
  • I
    wonder how many deaths are caused by Christmas decorating every year.
  • Who
    was the sadist that named those things at the start of list points
    "bullets"?
  • If you
    are ever lost in China,
    just keep saying "wang chung" and eventually all of your
    problems will be solved... one way or another.

  • 6:51 am
  • 3 Comments