August 4, 2008

• I'm not in it for you, princess

  I suppose I should try to explain my obvious lack of Xanga posts over these last couple of days. The reason is fairly simple actually. Aside from working and preparing for a trip next weekend, I have been, for better or worse, hooked onto an old DOS game I found called Princess Maker 2.

  
  

  Let me tell you the basic premise, and you will see instantly why this game is awesome. You see, the character you play as is a wandering mercenary who just saved a world single-handedly from a demon onslaught. In return for this act, the king gives him citizenship and a yearly stipend to protect the village. Shortly thereafter, the gods, for some reason or another, saw fit to give this gifted swordsman a little girl for him to raise on his own. Thus begins the game...
  Yes, this game is all about raising your "daughter" in the best way you can. That's right: it's a time sink. It's also fiendishly difficult. Who knew raising a daughter would be so challenging? This game has multiple endings based on how you raise your daughter. These endings range from the great (queen, prime minister, archbishop, etc.) to the... less than optimal (divorcee, part-time farmer, prostitute, etc.). Thus far, I have only raised my daughter into a part-time farmer or lumberjack (F@CK!). Apparently, I make a terrible father. I'm sure slaying another thousand demon kings would be easier.
  The core gameplay revolves around choosing activities for your daughter every month. These activities have various effects on her character stats. Stats? Yeah, it's an RPG... of sorts. Rather than fighting for all of your stat increases, you have to do stuff. Have a gutter-mouth for a kid? Send her to some protocol classes to improve her Refinement stat. Is your daughter a sinner before God? Send her to work at the church for a few days to improve her Morals stat and likewise decrease her Sin stat (not recommended if you want your daughter to grow up to be an S&M queen). My favorite thing to do is send my ten-year-old daughter to work on a farm for a month to improve her Constitution and Strength. She becomes less refined, but that's carefully balanced out by the satisfaction of sending a ten-year-old girl to work on a farm. Other jobs? How about sending your daughter to work at a graveyard, brickworks, or cabaret (big $$$ for underage girlz)?
  All in all, I'm still playing this game just to figure out a good way to play. It's tough, but I'm sure I will be quite satisfied when my cabaret dancer grows up to be the kingdom's archbishop. Needless to say, posts will continue to be sporadic, at best.

  • 7:18 pm
  • 6 Comments